Steamy Streaming: Sexy Horror

BY: Zak Wojnar

It’s Halloween, so you know what that means; time to watch some scary movies. This week’s selection for Steamy Streaming provide a gory array of sex, knives, chainsaws, and gallons of fake blood. Get ready for some good kills in some of our favorite sexy horror movies.

The Hunger

Tony Scott came swinging out of the gate with his first feature film, The Hunger. Loosely based on the novel by Whitley Strieber, The Hunger follows what was, in an era before Twilight, the sexiest vampire story ever told. To be fair, vampires are always sexy, but when your movie stars Susan Sarandon, Catherine Deneuve, and David Bowie, it’s a whole other level of sex appeal. Throw in some nasty bloodsucking and literal and metaphorical man-eating, and you’ve got a vampire classic for all time.

Halloween

What more can be said about Halloween? John Carpenter‘s seminal proto-slasher continues to define the genre, even forty years after its original release. The long-awaited sequel, also titled Halloween, blew away all box office expectations with its opening weekend of over $76 million. Jamie Lee Curtis is as gorgeous now, as a hardened survivor armed with reading glasses and a hunting rifle, as when she was just a scared teenager, hiding in the closet from her masked stalker. Catch this one on Shudder, the premiere horror app (available as a channel on Amazon Prime) which also hosts classics like Re-Animator, The Birds, and Coralie Fargeat‘s Revenge, which is easily one of the best films of 2018.

The Babysitter

This Netflix original is directed by McG. Best known for his work in the gloriously campy Charlie’s Angels films, he brings his candy-colored touch and knack for incredible stunts and practical visual effects to The Babysitter, one of the most surprising movies of 2017. What begins as a heartwarming tale of a young boy and his babysitter turns into a nightmare when the young worrywart discovers that his mentor and crush is actually a satanic witch who needs the blood of the innocent to fulfill her wishes. What follows is a cat-and-mouse thrill ride anchored by devilishly nasty kills, witty comedy, and a pervasive sense of style. The film’s secret weapon, however, is Samara Weaving as Bee, the titular babysitter, who is as beautiful as she is psychotic. She delivers an incredible performance, and we see nothing but great things in her future as an actor.

Cat People

The original, 1942 version of Cat People was certainly sexy and provocative for its day, and is regarded as a timeless horror classic, but we’re not talking about that one right now; we’re talking about Paul Schrader‘s boundary-pushing 1982 remake, which cranked the sexuality up to eleven. For proof of this, look no further than Nastassja Kinski, who is one of the most recognizable sex symbols of the decade. Malcolm McDowell plays her brother (also a cat person), and the late John Heard also stars. We don’t want to give away too much of the plot, but if you’re a fan of Provokr, then you need to see Cat People. It just might be the most Provokr movie ever.

American Psycho

Is there no psychopath more mesmerizing than Patrick Bateman? Christian Bale‘s performance as the Wall Street scumbag (who is also a serial killer) is his most iconic role; and when one’s resume includes playing Batman in one of the most acclaimed superhero movies ever made, The Dark Knight, that’s really saying something. Bateman is obsessed with his image, with his power, with his manhood, but he is a white collar, pencil pushing creep with too much hair gel; men like Bateman are so far removed from the concept of masculinity that they overcompensate with narcissism, empty assurances of self-importance, and a deep-rooted hatred they have to choice but to direct outward, towards anyone in their path.

Also, he drops a chainsaw on a lady and kisses himself during sex. This movie is nuts, and we love it! Still, it’s hard not to fear that there are too many toxic men who love American Psycho for all the wrong reasons.

Fun Fact: If you leave Christian Bale in the microwave for too long, he becomes Donald Trump Jr.