BY: Georgia Davis

At PROVOKR, we understand the frustration when the cast of a film is announced. We think, “Oh, this other person would have been much better in that role.” We often fantasize about how we would recast our favorite films with a more modern outlook. So why not write about it?

We mostly turned to our favorite TV series to think about what it would be like to see our favorite characters in films like Brokeback Mountain, La La Land or Sleepless In Seattle. And the results were hilarious.

BROKEBACK MOUNTAIN: ZENDAYA AND HUNTER SCHAEFFER

Nothing against Heath Ledger and Jake Gyllenhaal, but Brokeback Mountain would be so much better with two women. They definitely know how to get down and dirty and their on-screen chemistry on HBO’s Euphoria is undeniable. You know you want to see them going all rugged in the Wyoming mountains. Let’s be real, Zendaya would be the one to say “I can’t quit you.”

LA LA LAND: SUTTON FOSTER AND NICO TORTORELLA

We are maybe a little too obsessed with Younger, but there is nothing extremely wrong with that. Sutton Foster can dance and she partnered up with Nico Tortorella in a drug-induced daydream on a recent episode of the sitcom. So knowing that both of them already have the moves, we’d like to see them waltz into Damien Chazelle’s La La Land. Fingers crossed that their Young relationship turns out better than Sebastian and Mia’s.

SPLENDOR IN THE GRASS: KRISTEN STEWART AND ROBERT PATTINSON

Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson are two of our favorite actors, and we would love to see their on- and off-screen romances again. They’re both in the arthouse film scene, so they can definitely pull of the hot romance in this 1961 classic starring Natalie Woods and Warren Beaty. But this one is mostly rooted in our selfishness to see them on screen together one more time.

A STAR IS BORN: BEYONCE AND AUSTIN BUTLER

OK, hear us out. Beyonce takes the role of Bradley Cooper’s character and Austin Butler is in Lady Gaga’s position. That makes way more sense than Beyonce being the up-and-coming artist. She isn’t called Queen B for nothing, am I right? As for Austin Butler, the hottie just landed the role as Elvis in Baz Luhrman’s biopic about the singer, so we know he has the moves and the pipes (not to mention that drool-worthy body). Calling all movie studios: Make this happen ASAP.

BLACK SWAN: TROYE SIVAN AND TOM HOLLAND

This recast is mostly based on the facts they have the bodies of ballet dancers, but there are other factors at play here. First, Troye Sivan is amazing and we really want to see him dancing and acting in Natalie Portman’s role. Second, Tom Holland is becoming one of the biggest names in the industry, just like Mila Kunis was when they filmed black Swan. Not to mention his Spider-Man agility would come in handy. Put them together and you have an epic horror tale of striving for perfection with a male twist. Maybe Natalie can take the place as the sexist predator troupe director. Now that would be a must-see.

GONE GIRL: ASIA KATE DILLON AND DAKOTA FANNING

If you can’t tell by now, we like some queer narratives represented in our favorite films. Asia Kate Dillon is the perfect person to play Nick Dunne as they are brilliant on Billions and can pull off any role. Dakota Fanning has just the right amount of psycho energy to pull off Amy Dunne’s elaborate stunts. This pair is a match made in heaven, and someone needs to make it happen.

ONCE UPON A TIME IN HOLLYWOOD: CHARLIZE THERON AND SCARLETT JOHANSSON

Anything Tarantino does turns into an instant classic, but we would love to see more leading women. Where are the women? His latest film, Once Upon A Time… In Hollywood, would be just as great if Charlize Theron and Scarlett Johansson were there in place of Leonardo DiCaprio and Brad Pitt. Just imagine them in Hollywood in the late 60s. It would be totally epic.

SE7EN: ANGELINA JOLIE, BRAD PITT, JENNIFER ANISTON AND IDRIS ELBA

We can only assume that Angelia Jolie and Jennifer Aniston may have pictured Brad Pitt’s severed head in a box, so there is really nothing to question here. It would be amazing to see two women in the cat and mouse major roles of SE7EN, with Jolie taking her ex-husband’s place and Anniston playing the way crazy serial killer. Oh, and put Jolie with Idris Elba and you have the most badass detective duo of all time.

SLEEPLESS IN SEATTLE: TAYLOR SCHILLING AND UZO ADUBA

Uzo Aduba’s “Crazy Eyes” doesn’t have the 1,000-yard stare. Instead she has the 3,000-mile gaze right into the heart of Taylor Schilling. Don’t try to tell me you haven’t at least looked at fanfic about these Orange Is The New Black stars. We can just picture Taylor listening in to late-night radio and hearing Uzo’s sad but funny story and exchanging prison letters and finally, upon release, meeting at the top of the Empire State Building. And we already know Suzanne would do anything for her “Dandelion” so we know in our hearts that it would be a winning relationship. You’ve got prison mail.